Where Productivity Goes to Die
Trusted by 0 productivity coaches. Ignored by HR departments everywhere.
Every disaster starts with good intentions
You're convinced the right desk toy will unlock your productivity potential. We admire your optimism. We don't share it.
You've graduated from toys to "systems." Your desk has never looked better. Your productivity has never been worse.
You've stopped pretending motivational quotes work. Make your walls as dead inside as you are.
You're not just buying products anymore. You're making a statement. That statement is: "I've given up, and I'm fine with it."
Technically still alive
"I started with one yo-yo to improve focus. Now I have 23. I haven't completed a single work task in 6 months but I can do 'Walk the Dog' blindfolded. This is progress."
Day 847"The Infinity Cube helped me realise that if I keep flipping it, I don't have to think about my quarterly report that's 3 months overdue. Each flip represents a completed mental task."
Day 412"I bought the desk organiser to minimise distractions. Then I bought 46 more items to organise with the organiser. My desk now occupies three rooms. This is what minimalism looks like."
Day 631"The 90-Day Journal changed my life. I'm on Day 1,204 of the 90-Day Challenge. Consistency is key. The journal told me so. I wrote the journal."
Day 1204"HR asked me to stop building magnetic sculptures during Zoom meetings. I built a fort out of the organiser boxes instead. They can't see me now. Checkmate, Lisa from HR."
Day 523"My coworker borrowed my yo-yo and never returned it. I've dedicated my life to making them regret this decision...."
Day 267